Why aren't you a Trump supporter?
Last Updated: 03.07.2025 00:27
I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup
I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t
I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones
I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes
I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight
It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms
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I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”
I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions
I can read
I know who the president of Turkey really is
I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”
I have an acute aversion to scumbags
I took the same Oath and took it seriously
I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”
I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”
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I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”
I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write
I don’t watch or listen to advertising
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I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard
I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane
I don’t cotton to rapists
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Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?
I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet
Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:
I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.
I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light
I actually pay taxes
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If someone works for me, I actually pay them
I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes
I see through liars
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I have complete contempt for traitorism
I have complete contempt for fakery
I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened
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I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink
I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center
A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y
I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality
I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t
I don’t buy bullshit
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I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”
Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.
I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”
When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP
EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that
I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”
I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”
I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t
I understand how hurricane paths work
I have a reading level above third grade
I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”
When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability
authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday
I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is
I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP
I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity
I can count
I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee
It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter